Growing Your Children from the Inside Out...

     You love your child and you tell them often, correct?  Correct.  Common expressions are probably the following: notes in lunch boxes, cards, baking their favorite foods, hugs, or a kiss.  But some aren’t so obvious. What about a wink, a pat on the arm, a high five, a ruffling of the hair?

     I’ve heard it said we need to hear 15 times a day love’s affirmation.  I’m not advocating a checklist, but I am advocating an understanding of our love language, if you will.  So the next time you ruffle that little guy’s hair, I suggest you stop.  Bend down, get down on his level, look into those big blue eyes and ask, “What did I just say to you?”  I guarantee you’ll get a blank look and a response of, “Nothin’.”  You say, “Oh, no! I told you a great deal.  I told you I love you.”

         Let a few days pass and do the same ruffling of hair and again, stop, bend down, look him in the eyes and ask the same question.  I predict a much different response.  This time you’ll get a big smile, perhaps a tilt of the head, and he will say, “You told me that you loved me!” You have communicated your love in a way that was oblivious to him before.

       In the same way, we need to understand God’s love language. Every day he communicates with us.  He ruffles our hair with his wind.  He winks at us as a cloud floats across the sun.  He kisses us with raindrops and snowflakes.  God tells us, and our children, everyday in a myriad of ways that He loves us. Help your child realize it. And a wonderful thing happens as we teach our children—we also teach ourselves.  Remember, we are all sons and daughters of the King!  1 John 3:1  

Kathy Dye, B. Ed., teaches a parenting class at the Belpre Church of Christ in Belpre, Ohio.

Used by permission.